Strap in tightly, brace yourself, and prepare to embark on an exhilarating roller-coaster of a journey. This narrative revolves around a woman, her boyfriend, and a dramatically unfolding saga that led her to ask Reddit for advice.
She sought answers, guidance, and perhaps reassurance, on whether she should stay in the relationship or part ways with her boyfriend. The catalyst for this soul-searching question? An incident involving a pair of Hamilton tickets.
It might sound trivial or like a scene from a sitcom, but as we delve deeper into the story, you'll realize it's anything but.
You see, this is not just about a mere disagreement. It's about the complexities of human relationships, the often confusing labyrinth of emotions, and the challenges posed by differing perspectives and expectations.
This woman, who we'll refer to as "Jane" for the purpose of this narrative, found herself in the midst of an interpersonal conundrum, questioning the very essence of her relationship.
The full story is too intriguing to be brushed aside, too captivating to be spoiled prematurely. We could easily let the cat out of the bag and reveal every twist and turn, but where's the fun in that? So, we'll hold back for now.
Instead, we'll let you explore the narrative on your own, as you try to unravel the intricacies of Jane's relationship and her predicament. Would you have done the same thing in her shoes? Would you have reacted differently? As we lay out the events that transpired, we invite you to ponder these questions.
Now, here's where the plot thickens. The dramatic incident involves a pair of tickets to the critically acclaimed musical, Hamilton. These tickets, usually hard to come by and often a cherished possession for any Broadway enthusiast, become the center of the relationship's storm.
Something happened, something that shook Jane's confidence in her boyfriend's respect for her passions and interests.
The tickets were not just a promise of an evening of high-quality entertainment but also a symbol of her personal passions, a testament to her love for the arts. And it was this symbol that was, seemingly, casually disregarded.
If you're wondering whether Jane should break up with her boyfriend over this incident, we won't keep you in suspense. Our perspective? Absolutely, she should. But are we being too hasty in our judgment? Perhaps. Or maybe we're seeing the situation for what it really is - a sign of deeper, underlying issues in their relationship.
But, as we navigate this narrative, we urge you to form your own opinion.
You might see things from a different angle, you might empathize with the boyfriend, or you might stand firmly in Jane's corner. Regardless of where you stand, we guarantee that this story will leave you contemplating the myriad ways in which human relationships are tested.
So, proceed with caution, and prepare to journey through a tale that's equal parts captivating and thought-provoking. It's time to delve into Jane's world and decide for yourself - should she end this relationship or give it another chance?
Backstory: My mother, an extraordinary woman of charm, wit, and unbounded kindness, is a significant figure in my life.
Her character is so vibrant and full of life that she genuinely stands out as one of the most endearing and humorous individuals I've ever had the privilege to know.
I consider myself genuinely fortunate to have been born as her daughter, a gift I cannot thank the stars enough for.
Born to her at a rather young age, I became the center of her universe. She was my single parent, my sole source of support, and the pillar that kept our small family standing tall.
Money was tight, our circumstances far from luxurious, yet she never let the hardships deter her.
We were on the poorer end of the spectrum, but even amidst the financial constraints, my mother's resolve remained unbroken. She was determined to provide for me, to ensure I had a proper childhood, and she did so with an unwavering spirit and a heart full of love.
Education was a priority for her. Despite our meager means, she went to great lengths to ensure that I received the best education possible. She believed that knowledge was the key to a brighter future, a belief she instilled in me from a young age.
Even under circumstances that were less than ideal, she upheld her commitment to my education, leaving no stone unturned in her quest to give me the best start in life.
One of the most touching aspects of our relationship was our mutual love for the theater. Theater, with its grandeur, its emotive performances, and its ability to transport the audience to a different world, held a special place in our hearts.
My mother, despite our tight budget, would put aside money to ensure that we could attend the musicals that toured our town.
We might have been tucked away in the cheap seats, far from the glitz and glamour of the front rows, but for us, it didn't matter. The thrill, the anticipation, the joy of watching a live performance was enough to keep us coming back for more.
These shared moments, these precious memories of attending theater with my mom, have left an indelible imprint on my heart.
The laughter, the tears, the sense of awe and amazement, all form the tapestry of my childhood memories.
It's these experiences, this shared love for the arts, that have significantly influenced my career choice.
Today, I work in the entertainment industry, on the corporate side. I may not have the singing voice to be on the stage, but I am part of the magic that brings the arts to life. Every day, I am reminded of my mother's love for the theater, her determination to give me these experiences despite our circumstances, and it fuels my dedication to my work.
My mom's sacrifices, her relentless pursuit of my happiness and well-being, and our shared love for the theater, have shaped me into the person I am today.
She is, and will always be, an integral part of my life story, a story of resilience, love, and a shared passion for the arts.
Flash forward to the present day. As with most aficionados of theater, my mother and I share a near-obsessive fascination with the musical phenomenon that is Hamilton. This theatrical masterpiece has captured our hearts and imaginations, becoming a shared point of bonding for us.
For anyone who might not be as deeply immersed in the world of theater, let me provide some context.
Hamilton is not just any show; it's a cultural phenomenon. Its popularity has skyrocketed to such an extent that securing tickets has become an almost Herculean task.
Unless, of course, you're prepared to wait until January of the following year, by which time some of the fervor might have cooled, and tickets may be more readily available.
In a fortunate turn of events, my career has placed me in a financial position where I can afford to indulge in passions such as these.
I was able to secure tickets for a performance in July, making it possible for my mom and me to experience the magic of Hamilton live. And these aren't just any tickets, but prime seats - fifth row center, putting us right in the heart of the action.
Perhaps it was luck, or maybe some form of divine intervention, but I managed to secure these tickets for a truly special occasion - the final performance of Lin Manuel Miranda.
For those unfamiliar with the name, Miranda is the creator and leading actor of Hamilton, and his final performance promises to be a momentous event.
I presented these tickets to my mom as a Christmas surprise back in December. The anticipation had been building since October when I first purchased the tickets. Her reaction made the months of secrecy entirely worth it.
But the experience doesn't stop at the theater doors. I've planned an entire week of activities to make the most of this trip. We're staying at a high-end hotel, providing us a luxurious base from which to explore the city.
I've made reservations at a multitude of restaurants that we've both been eager to try. As self-proclaimed foodies, this is an opportunity to indulge in the city's culinary scene.
We're also planning to immerse ourselves in the city's culture, checking off a list of tourist attractions that we've always wanted to visit. It's going to be a week filled with new experiences and shared memories.
And of course, we can't forget about the other shows. We're hoping to squeeze in at least one more theatrical experience before we leave, turning our Hamilton adventure into a full-blown theater extravaganza.
This trip is shaping up to be more than just a theater outing; it's a celebration of our shared love for the arts, a chance to immerse ourselves in a city brimming with culture and history, and an opportunity to create memories that will last a lifetime.
We're both incredibly thrilled about it and I can see her enthusiasm mirrored in the way she's chosen to countdown the days.
She has this quaint little chalkboard that she uses as a makeshift planner. It's a charming artifact that has now turned into a daily reminder of the exciting event that awaits us.
Every day, she rubs off the previous day's count, etches the new one, and sends me a picture of it. It's incredibly adorable and I can't help but share in her joy every time I see those pictures.
In the midst of all this excitement, there was another development in my life.
It was in January that I met Josh. Josh isn't his real name, but that's how I'll refer to him in this narrative for the sake of maintaining his privacy.
We started off as casual acquaintances, not really exclusive or committed. But as we spent more time together, our relationship evolved and grew stronger. Over the past two months, it has morphed into something serious and meaningful.
Josh and I work in the same industry, but our professional lives are quite different.
He works on the corporate side of the entertainment industry, although his agency is different from mine.
It's a world of hustle and high stakes, where he has managed to secure a position that's higher than mine. He's successful, and his financial success is quite evident.
He makes significantly more money than I do, and as you'll see soon, this detail becomes important as my story unfolds.
Our first meeting was at an industry event.
These events are usually rife with networking and professional exchanges, but what happened between Josh and me was entirely different.
We hit it off instantly. There was an undeniable chemistry between us that made our conversation flow effortlessly.
I found myself drawn to him, and that connection we felt that day had the potential to blossom into something more serious.
Until this point in our relationship, I hadn't seen any red flags. Everything seemed perfect.
But, as I reminisce about our time together, I can't help but feel a sense of unease.
I find myself revisiting our moments, sifting through my memories, trying to spot any potential warning signs.
I'm meticulously searching for any unnoticed signs or overlooked details that could have hinted at a problem.
My mind is plagued with this nagging question: have I missed something? As I continue to delve deeper into my memories, I hope to find some answers.
Josh hails from a family background that is significantly wealthier than mine.
He's the eldest in a family where affluence is a norm, which creates a stark contrast between our life situations.
This difference in familial financial statuses is not just marginally, but rather immensely so.
His family's material wealth surpasses that of my family by a considerable amount, creating an interesting blend of experiences and perspectives in our relationship.
In addition to Josh, his family also includes a younger sister.
For the purpose of this narrative, I'll refer to her as Jennifer.
At 17, Jennifer is in the throes of what can only be described as an intense and tumultuous 'troubled teen phase.' The typical signs of rebellious adolescence are evident in her behavior, but with a slightly darker twist.
Jennifer has developed a pattern of skipping school and indulging in smoking, which is a cause for concern.
Her disrespectful attitude towards her parents adds another layer of complexity to her already troubled behavior.
Despite her actions, it's important to note that Jennifer is not necessarily a bad kid.
I have only had the opportunity to meet her once, but from my observation and what I've gleaned from Josh, it appears she's wrestling with some deep-seated issues.
She gives off an aura of sadness, an undercurrent of unhappiness that seems to run deep.
I believe she could greatly benefit from therapy, something that could provide her with the tools to navigate her emotions better and perhaps get to the root of her behavior.
I suggested this idea to Josh in the hope that it might provide Jennifer with some much-needed assistance.
Unfortunately, Josh responded that his parents harbor a certain disdain towards therapy.
They seem to have a prejudiced view about therapy in general, which is creating a roadblock for Jennifer's potential path to recovery.
This is a significant concern, as it prevents Jennifer from getting the help that could potentially alter the course of her life for the better.
Despite their daughter’s evident troubled behavior, Josh's parents feel helpless, stating that they've tried everything to reach out to Jennifer to no avail.
They feel like they can't penetrate the wall that Jennifer has built around herself, making it difficult for them to connect with her and understand her struggles.
What's even more concerning is that they've tried everything except seeking professional help, such as getting her to see a counselor.
This "hands-off" approach, coupled with their dismissal of therapy, is doing more harm than good. It's a tricky situation, one that requires understanding, patience, and most importantly, the right kind of intervention.
Indeed, Jennifer's situation is a complex one, a puzzle that needs to be solved delicately, and with care.
Actual problem time: On a typical Sunday evening, I found myself comfortably nestled within the confines of my own home, enjoying the company of my dear friend, Josh.
Our evening was punctuated with the rich, velvety notes of a fine bottle of wine, the two of us sipping leisurely, savouring not just the taste but also the shared moments of warmth and camaraderie.
As the wine flowed, so did our merriment, our attention drawn towards the television screen illuminating the room with the vibrant hues of the Tony Awards show.
This renowned theatre awards event held us both captivated as we nestled closer, engrossed in the spectacle unfolding before us.
One of the highlights of the evening was the much-anticipated performance by the troupe from Hamilton.
As the cast took to the stage, my phone came alive with a flurry of enthusiastic texts from my mother.
Clearly, she was as enraptured by the performance as we were, her excitement palpable even through the digital medium.
Her animated messages brought a smile to my face, her enthusiasm contagious. I couldn't resist showing Josh the stream of excited texts my mom was sending.
I held out my phone to him, my amusement mirrored in his eyes as he skimmed through the messages.
Yet, as he handed back the phone, I noticed a shift in his demeanor.
It was subtle, a slight change in his aura that was hard to pinpoint but unmistakable.
He didn't say anything out of the ordinary, yet his usual joviality seemed to have been replaced by a certain strange aloofness.
Our conversation took a turn when he inquired about the date of the show we were planning to attend.
Upon hearing my response, he excused himself to take a call in the other room.
Now, it wasn't unusual for either of us to be interrupted by work-related calls, given the nature of our respective professions.
However, with the recent change in Josh's behavior, I couldn't help but feel a twinge of unease.
Nevertheless, I brushed it off, not wanting to read too much into it. After all, he had recently been grappling with some professional challenges and it was possible that the stress was taking a toll.
When he returned, his spirits seemed to be lifted, his earlier strange behavior replaced with an unusually upbeat mood.
However, our evening was cut short when he announced that he had to return home early.
He explained that he had to sign some documents at his office the following morning, well before our planned brunch with his parents.
Although we often found ourselves navigating the unpredictable ebbs and flows of our busy work lives, this sudden change of plans caught me slightly off guard.
But, I reminded myself to be understanding, recognizing the demands of his job. After all, these spontaneous interruptions were not unusual in our lives.
That afternoon, as he picked me up from work, his face was lighted up with a rare joy, a sign that he was in an unusually good mood.
The day was young, and we had plans to go for a brunch with his parents.
I was still getting used to these occasional familial gatherings, as it was only my second time meeting his parents. However, his buoyant spirits were contagious and did much to dispel my nervousness.
As we navigated through the city streets, I couldn't help but wonder about his sudden uplifted mood.
Being the curious one in our relationship, I decided to probe a little and asked him about the reason behind his cheerful demeanor.
He responded with a vague remark about how things were going well at the office. He also mentioned something about a deal he'd been laboring over that was finally coming to fruition.
I was tempted to ask more about it, but I stopped myself.
We both had an unspoken agreement to leave our work-related matters at the office door.
The reasons for this were twofold: firstly, most work topics were fairly mundane and banal, hardly the stuff of engaging conversation.
Secondly, both our professions required us to sign extensive non-disclosure agreements, which made any detailed discussion about our work lives legally precarious.
His response did little to quell my curiosity, but I let the matter rest, choosing to focus on the upcoming brunch.
We arrived at the venue, a quaint little café nestled in the heart of the city.
His parents were already there, waiting for us. As soon as his mother saw me, she enveloped me in a warm, motherly hug, her eyes sparkling with genuine gratitude.
She expressed her profound thanks for my kindness, a sentiment that left me a bit perplexed.
Her husband, his father, was no less appreciative.
He extended a firm handshake and echoed his wife's sentiments, thanking me for "helping out with Jen".
I stood there, a bit taken aback by their unexpected praise. The confusion was evident on my face as I wracked my brain, trying to figure out what on earth they were talking about.
I was at a loss. I had no idea what I had supposedly done to help her.
Their earnest gratitude was mystifying, and I found myself momentarily speechless.
I exchanged a glance with him, my eyes mirroring the confusion I felt. It was clear that we were both caught off-guard by their sudden outpouring of gratitude.
As I stood there, amidst the bustle of the café, I was filled with a whirlwind of thoughts.
What had I done to warrant such heartfelt thanks? And most importantly, why was he in such an unusually good mood?
The answers to these questions remained elusive, leaving me in a state of bewilderment.
The brunch, which was supposed to be a casual, familial gathering, had suddenly taken an unexpected turn, leaving me curious and intrigued.
The room that day was filled with an air of surprise and confusion, as the matter of the Hamilton tickets came into the open.
The conversation was initially light-hearted, but the atmosphere soon changed the moment the subject of Hamilton tickets was introduced.
I turned to her with surprise etched on my face, as she thanked me for the tickets I hadn't even promised to give away.
My eyes then darted to Josh, my boyfriend. His face was split into a wide grin, a sight that would normally warm my heart, but at that moment it only added to my bewilderment.
I was left wondering if he knew something I didn't.
It turned out that he indeed did.
Apparently, during one of his so-called "business calls," he had been conversing with Jen.
The discussion? The promise of my Hamilton tickets, a promise he made without my knowledge or consent.
Caught off guard, I struggled to articulate my thoughts.
The unexpected revelation had knocked the wind out of me, leaving me stammering for words. I tried to explain that I was completely oblivious to this, only to be met with the disapproving gaze of Josh.
His face was a picture of annoyance, a stark contrast to the amiable expression he had on just a few moments ago.
His parents, too, were taken aback, their eyes wide with surprise.
What shocked me further was the reaction of his mother.
Instead of displaying anger towards Josh for his presumptuous act, she instead turned the focus on me.
"Well, you can still give them to her though right?" she enquired, as if it was the most natural thing to do.
The room went silent, and all eyes turned to me.
It was as if they expected me to willingly give away the tickets, agreeing to their absurd proposition without a hint of protest.
It felt as though I was being cornered, with nowhere to run or hide.
Summoning all the courage I had, I tried to explain the significance of the trip.
The Hamilton show was not just a mere pastime; it was something far more personal.
The tickets were meant for a trip with my mom - a special event that we had been looking forward to for so long.
It held immense meaning for my mother, who had dreamt of watching the show since its inception.
To give away those tickets would not only mean breaking my promise to my mother but also shattering a dream she had harbored for so long.
The room was filled with a tense silence as I laid bare the importance of the Hamilton tickets.
I could only hope for understanding, that they would realize the gravity of the situation and the sentiment attached to the tickets.
The ball was now in their court, their reactions would ultimately decide the fate of the Hamilton tickets.
This peculiar incident unfolded as three individuals began to discuss how Jen was unusually ecstatic about something.
It was a peculiar sight for them because it was the first instance in a good while where Jen had expressed genuine happiness instead of her usual perturbed demeanor.
It was a fascinating spectacle, watching their faces light up as they shared this observation amongst each other.
This conversation, revolving around Jen's unexpected surge of excitement, dominated the next thirty minutes.
The trio conversed animatedly, conjecturing the reasons behind her sudden change of mood.
However, the situation took a sharp turn when the parents, involved in the discussion, left in a huff. The father, in his anger, even went so far as to call me a selfish cow.
His words left me utterly flabbergasted, so much so that I was rendered speechless, mostly absorbing his harsh words without being able to defend myself properly.
A wave of disbelief washed over me, making it hard for me to respond adequately.
Once the parents had left, Josh and I found ourselves outside the brunch venue.
Without wasting a moment, he began to rail at me for my alleged selfishness.
According to him, Jen was grappling with a much more severe crisis than anyone of us could comprehend.
However, he was quite vague about the specifics, making it difficult for me to understand his point fully.
Moreover, he accused me of being immature for trivializing the significance of a musical.
This public confrontation was exceedingly uncomfortable for me, as I despise having arguments in the open.
Besides, the venue was one of my favourite brunch spots, and the last thing I wanted was to feel embarrassed every time I visited it in the future.
As the confrontation escalated, Josh crossed a line by resorting to an offensive slur.
His harsh words left me stunned, even more so considering we were in public. Once he finished his tirade, he briskly walked off to fetch his car.
The situation became even more awkward as he had to wait by the valet stand, his anger still palpable.
I, on the other hand, was left to wait for my Uber, the tension from our argument still lingering in the air.
His abrupt departure left me feeling a mix of emotions, ranging from shock to embarrassment, turning an otherwise regular brunch into a memorable moment for all the wrong reasons.
That evening, as the day was drawing to a close, I decided to reach out to him.
I took my phone out, opened our chat, and texted him a message; my thumbs danced over the keyboard as I typed out my thoughts.
The message was simple and straightforward, yet it carried a certain weight.
"While I'm not giving up my tickets," I began, indicating my firm intention not to relinquish my rights to the tickets I had procured, "there are still some available on that date."
In the current market, the price of these tickets had skyrocketed.
The tickets, which were once originally priced much cheaper, were now being sold for approximately $2,500.
The drastic increase can be attributed to the scandalous activities of ticket scalpers who had bought up the tickets in bulk, only to sell them at a significantly marked-up price for their own profit.
However, the price tag, though shockingly high, was not a matter of concern for me.
I have been fortunate enough to be surrounded by people who can afford such luxuries.
Neither my boyfriend nor my parents would bat an eyelid at the mention of such a price.
To illustrate, just last week my boyfriend made a rather casual purchase; a watch worth $3,000.
It wasn't a necessity, nor was it a special occasion. It was a purchase made purely for the joy of it, a testament to the financial comfort he enjoys.
Having sent the text, I waited for a response.
The reply I received, however, left me rather taken aback.
The only response I got from him was a statement of clear refusal and disbelief at the high ticket price.
He expressed that he found the price to be exorbitant, an assertion I agreed with considering the circumstances. But that wasn't the main issue at hand.
My point wasn't about whether the price was fair or not, but about my decision not to give up my tickets.
Despite the explanation, he was adamant in his refusal to pay the fee.
What was even more surprising was his inability to understand my stance.
He questioned why I couldn't just give the tickets to Jen, clearly missing the point of my message.
It seemed as though the conversation wasn't about the tickets anymore, but about our differing perspectives.
Even though I had laid out my thoughts clearly, he had focused on the financial aspect rather than understanding the sentiment behind my decision.
In his view, the tickets were a commodity that could be easily passed on, whereas for me they held a certain significance that couldn't be easily disregarded.
This difference in our viewpoints marked a critical point in our conversation and perhaps, in our understanding of each other.
The tickets, the prices, the decision - they were all a part of a larger dialogue, a dialogue about understanding, respect, and empathy.
He refuses to pay and he didn't understand why I couldn't just give the tickets to Jen.
If you thought that story was hard to stomach, here's another one about a woman dealing with an awful dude.
In an epic tale where Cinderella meets modern-day social media warriors, one woman found herself shackled to a less-than-charming prince.
But fear not, for the knights in shining armor weren't galloping on horses;
instead, they were furiously typing on keyboards!
Dive into this roller-coaster of a story where Reddit users become the unlikely heroes,
turning the upvote button into a true life-saver and proving once again that sometimes,
your digital fairy godmother is just a subreddit away!
We all know the internet can be a nightmare,
especially when it comes to online dating.
But this story will restore your faith in the worldwide web, and humanity in general.
It all starts with Reddit user mymindisinborabora asked for some relationship advice pertaining to her awful boyfriend.
And you know how desperate she must have been for advice if she was coming to Reddit for help.
But they really pulled through on this one.
Thanks to everyone who reads this, I'll try to keep it short.
My boyfriend of 5 months just moved in with me three weeks ago.
He had some problems with his apartment (damp walls) and it has to be renovated.
As my roommate is currently spending some time abroad,
I told him it would be ok if he stayed at my place for 4 to 6 weeks (he'll be able to move back to his own apartment by that time).
So, now we've been living together for three weeks and things started out great.
Jealousy had been a bit of a problem between us because we often go out separately probably once a week but coming home to the same apartment helped him get over his (unjustified) jealousy.
Buuut there has been one new problem.
Now, this may seem petty at first, but I'm really at my wits' end with this one.
Ever since he moved in with me, things started disappearing and then reappearing one day later
in the same place they were missing from.
I'm talking about documents, small household items and food.
And it's not like "losing" keys and then finding them again somewhere,
I specifically look for something in a certain place where it isn't, but is there the next day.
For example, I like to take a chocolate bar with me to work in the morning, and for that,
I normally have a pack of chocolate bars at home.
Shortly after he moved in with me, I woke up to find all the chocolate was gone.
I asked him about it, he said he didn't know anything about it.
I come home just to find the chocolate bars are in the cupboard again!
I ask him, he says he doesn't know anything about it. "Maybe you just didn't see them in the morning".
We're talking about a large pack with about 12 chocolate bars, how can I not see that?
At first, I thought it was maybe some strange kind of humor,
but he seems angry when I bring it up and it's starting to really piss me off,
because sometimes, it's been items belonging to one of my friends that I wanted to give back to them and then couldn't,
or it was certain documents I needed for a certain day.
Now, I have absolutely no idea what this is about.
I am not crazy, I just don't understand AT ALL.
He gets really angry when I talk about it, saying I'm making this up just to "cause drama".
Why should I? I have no idea what's going on. Any ideas?
or it was certain documents I needed for a certain day.
I hope this doesn't get buried, but OP I have read what you wrote, and your responses to questions and I'm a little bit concered with the following.
Things appear to go missing are directly linked with you leaving the house. It's almost like he is trying to subtely stop you from leaving.
He is jealous of you going out with your single friends.
Him being angry that you think its too soon to introduce him to your family. He seems to be pushing the relationship to be serious quickly by using guilt.
These CAN be the warning signs of a potentially abusive relationship.
These behaviors start small and insidious and esculate. I had a friend who started a relationship and her boyfriend hated the fact she hung out with me, as I was single and particpated in what he called 'slutty' activities, like hanging out with friends at bars and having males as friends.
I was concerned about his level of jealously and apparent hate of her single friends and warned her. She seemed to think it was normal and was just a little insecure.
She exited that relationship two years later and admitted to us all that he was physically and emotionally abusive.
I'm not saying everyone who is jealous is an abuser, but combined with other red flags, you should be cautious. Do not let him dictate who you can and cannot hang out with.
Don't let him guilt you into doing things you are uncomfortable with. I will PM you an information sheet about abusive relationships. Please be wary and look at the situation with this new information OP.
pigeonsbepigeoning
The fact that he acts like you are crazy when you ask is the problem.
The fact that he accuses you of trying to start drama is a problem.
He wants something from you but won't articulate what it actually is.
You did mention there was a jealousy issue,
I don't know if these are in any way connected but they could be.
Bottom line is that you are seeing what he is like when you are living together and it is not good.
goatismycopilot
My heart hurts for you. I dealt with this. Everything was so great, perfect actually for the first 4 or so months, and then there was this huge freak out.
He started trying to make me feel crazy. He still talked with his ex fiance, and would tell me he still loved her, but wanted me. (You know, the love takes a while to fade thing).
I stupidly married him after dating for a year (and finally divorced after 3 1/3 years of marriage). What he was doing worked.
He broke me down so much that I had no strength; no self worth anymore. Little things he would do included: stepping out of the room to talk to someone. He was in earshot (without me straining to ease drop).
He would tell his ex how much he loved her and missed her, and how I don't compare. He walked back into the room, said goodbye to her right before he turned the corner (so the phone was now in his hand hanging up), sat next to me and kissed me. When I got upset and brought it up, he said I was crazy, that he wasn't on the phone.
Showed me his phone too, that he wasn't talking to her. It took me a long time to realize that he didn't talk to her, but he wanted me to think he had, and for me to think I was going crazy. He also used to hide stuff from me, saying I was forgetful. I eventually found a pile of things in his parents' backyard storage...things I had "lost".
I hope for your sake this isn't your case, but if it is, realize it sooner than later. It saves so much heartache.
WhitNit87
After I read all about gaslighting I ordered a nanny cam.
Unfortunately, the delivery took four days and after day one I already knew I couldn't be with him any longer.
I wanted him out of the apartment asap and with as little drama as possible.
I told him that my roommate had gotten a really interesting job offer and would cut her vacation short and come home in a week,
so he had to move out.
He was pretty angry, but I told him that there was nothing I could do.
I also told him (as some of you suggested) that his landlord had to get him a place to stay and that he should call him.
The next day, he told me that he had talked to his landlord and he could move back in his own flat on the following weekend.
The renovations had not taken as long as planned.
At this point, I doubt the apartment ever had "damp walls" to begin with but who knows.
In the evening he asked me if I wanted to move in with him because "it works so well" and "you don't like your roommate anyway" (I never even said that!).
I told him sure, I would move in with him in June. He was pretty excited about it.
While I was waiting for the nanny cam to arrive, there was one incident when something went missing, a book that I had ordered for my dad over Amazon and wanted to bring him the next day (at least that's what I told my bf).
Of course, in the morning, the book was gone. I chose to ignore it and he reacted quite strange to it, even asked me on my way out if I had taken the book with me (why on Earth would he ask that if he didn't expect a reaction from me?).
I just asked: "What book?" "The book you wanted to bring your dad." "I don't know what you're talking about."
In the evening, the book was on my desk again (of course!) and I ignored it again. Two hours later, he casually walks by my desk and says: "Ah, that's the book I was talking about!" I just said: "Oh, that book." He seemed pretty angry for the rest of the evening.
Two days later, the nanny cam finally arrived. I set it up while he was at the gym and again, when he was there, placed a letter I needed for work on my desk. I wasn't surprised at all when it was gone a few hours later and re-appeared the next day.
When I finally was alone at home again and could check out the nanny cam evidence, I only saw what I already knew: he took the letter while passing the desk, put it in his gym bag and put it back a few hours later.
However, as soon as I saw the "evidence", I decided against confronting him. To be honest, I was scared of his reaction and had already decided to break it off as soon as possible.
Also, the camera didn't show me his motive and I figured he probably wouldn't tell me anyway.
However, it frustrated me very much that I would probably never know why he did it and on the last evening before he moved back to his "newly renovated" apartment,
I told him I wanted to watch an old movie called Gaslight (Thanks for the tip everybody, it really is a great movie!)
He sat with me through the whole movie, but was quieter than usual while I talked the whole time about how unrealistic the movie was and that he was obviously insane.
I actually expected some kind of reaction from him but he just sat there looking nervous.
On Sunday, he took all his stuff back to his apartment.
My brother had organized someone to come and change the locks, and as soon as that was done,
I wrote my bf a text telling him that it was over,
I had no interest in being contacted again, that our break up was final and I thought it was very sad that he had to hide my things to keep the relationship interesting.
Since then, he called me more or less non stop but I haven't picked up and I won't.
I know, this isn't the most heroic or exciting ending, I could have confronted him with the video evidence but instead I cowardly broke up with a text message.
However, I really didn't want to confront him and have a dramatic fight. I just wanted it to be over as soon and as smoothly as possible.
If there's anything I've learned from this, it's to not rush into a relationship.
For the past 7 years, I've jumped from one LTR to the next and I think it's time to stay single for a while and concentrate on my college classes.
For now, I'm going to stay at my brother's for two or three weeks and I should probably change my phone number. I'm sorry that I can't give you any insight on why he did it.
It may have been cleptomania, a "prank" or messing with my stuff because something about me frustrated him. I will probably never know.
In all the texts he's sent me it only says that he doesn't know what I'm talking about and he never took my things!
But not every story is as cut and dry as these last two.
Here's a story where a woman TRIED to come to the Internet for support on a situation with her boyfriend.
But the internet had...questions.
When the age-old phrase, "caught in the act" took a familial twist, things got hilariously complicated.
Dive into this uproarious tale of mistaken intentions,
as a woman's innocent cuddle session with her sibling sends her boyfriend's eyebrows (and assumptions) skyrocketing.
Or maybe it...wasn't so innocent after all?
How close are you with your sibling?
We've all heard of sibling rivalry, but have you ever heard of sibling cuddling?
This story you're about to read gets weird quick, and then gets even weirder.
A reddit user (who has since been kicked off the site, potentially as a direct result of this... gulp),
shared a wild tale of how her closeness — literally and physically —
with her brother resulted in problems with her relationship.
Read on, and let us know what you think is going on here.
"I know this story may sound absurd but bear with me, please.
So, I’m a college student and I’ve been living with my boyfriend (21 M) since last year.
I’m attending an out-of-state university by the way.
My brother had some business to do in a nearby city from today ’till Friday.
He decided to take a little detour and arrive at my place on Saturday and spend the weekend with me and then take an early morning flight to his destination on Monday since it’s close-by.
I had a very busy and tiring day prior to his arrival though so I told him that I was going to leave the door unlocked and he could just come in as I didn’t want to be woken up
(he was supposed to get to my apartment at around 6 AM).
My boyfriend left on Friday to spend the night at his parents’ house because his mom was not feeling well.
He knew that my brother was coming over.
My brother arrives on Saturday at around 6:30 AM.
He tries to wake me up but to no avail.
He tells me: ‘If you’re not going to wake up, at least let me get into bed ’cause it’s cold and I’m sleepy too.’
I say okay and he gets in.
We immediately fall asleep.
My boyfriend’s yelling wakes us up at around 10:30 AM.
He starts saying how this is ‘basically cheating’,
asking if we had sex, if we’re in an incestuous relationship, etc.,
that this is absolutely disgusting and mega inappropriate and other delusional things like that.
I tell him that we’ve always shared a bed while living at home and that this is 100% platonic.
He lets me know that ‘we were snuggling under the blankets while sleeping’.
I tell him yeah, that’s what people do when they share a bed and it’s cold.
I start to get really angry at him at this point for constantly trying to sexualize me and my brother’s relationship
so I tell him that I’m going to spend the weekend with my brother at a hotel and until I come back he better learn how to manage this irrational jealousy of his.
I’m back at my apartment now but my boyfriend gives me the cold shoulder.
Following this story, the internet had a lot of, ahem... questions.
The original poster clarified a few things.
Apparently, her boyfriend set up a guest room for her brother.
The hotel room they got together had only one bed.
And whenever she was asked whether or not they were wearing clothes, she avoided the question.
The post got so crazy that it was actually removed, but the reactions from Reddit are still here in all their glory.
And opinions on this story are all over the place.
There is a guest room which her boyfriend set up for her brother and she admits they intentionally avoided using it and were intentionally spooning (big spoon, little spoon).
Then when they got a hotel room together, they made sure to get a room with only 1 bed so they could do it all over again.
Lastly, OP keeps avoiding answering what they were wearing, if anything.
I can not imagine it being "OK" with them choosing to have her brother's...pressed firmly up against her...with them holding each other tightly.
Then going to a hotel to ensure they can do it all over again (1 bed).
Plus, she avoids what they were or were not wearing under those covers.
Sharing a bed is one thing, but nothing in her comments seems right.
Linux-Is-Best
I definitely think OP is leaving stuff out.
Like how there was a guest bed available and how they were literally spooning.
This also probably isn’t the first time something like this as happened.
I think the fact that it might be part of a pattern helps to explain and contextualize the BF’s reaction.
TheGreatEmanResu
Yeah. He basically thought "You MUST be cheating on me, so; incest, right?".
chupala69
Is this thread full of dudes wanting to snuggle their sister in bed or something?
It's a bit odd, but not necessarily sexual in any way.
However I can see him being weirded out but his reaction is over the top and straight to his comments raises flags.
Edit* hold up, he had a guest bedroom he could have slept in?!
And you got a hotel with one bed and by snuggling is big spoon little spoon?
Yeah, y'all's relationship isn't normal
Jredrum
This is his weird sexual issue.
I guess it is privilege too.
I mean it is really like only a few hundred years since every family lived in one room.
cinnamngrl
You admit you two intentionally spooned (big spoon, little spoon). You acknowledge that your boyfriend set up the guest room for your brother, but you and your brother decided it was better to spoon in your boyfriend's bed.
When your boyfriend voiced his confusion and concern, you and your brother booked a hotel room with only 1 bed so you two could continue to full-on spoon together again.
When asked what you were wearing, if anything, you continue to dodge the question.
Nothing about this seems right.
It is one thing to share a bed, but it is an entirely different thing for you two to go out of your way to spoon one another and then rub it in his face by getting a hotel room with only 1 bed so you can do it again.
It is not normal to have your sibling's...pressed up against your...with you two holding each other tightly. Then for you to get a hotel room so you can share 1 bed to do it all over again.
And I cannot help notice you keep avoiding answering what either of you was wearing, if anything.
Linux-Is-Best
Is he an only child? Just curious. Some people can't understand sibling bonds. Either an only child or siblings who doesn't have a good relationship. Even then, friends cuddle sometimes too. Siblings even more so. I have a nephew, whom I live with, (we look more like siblings than aunt-nephew) and on a typical free time, we would be on the couch, legs tangled together while I'm on my phone and he on his switch. It's normal.
If he doesn't change his stance on this, you should break up with him. Next thing you know he's gonna accuse you and your father's relationship when he gives you a hug and a kiss or (god forbid) when he walks you down the isle.
Edit: Changing my vote to ESH. OP had failed to include on the original post that she and BF prepared a guestroom beforehand. While it isn't wrong to cuddle/share a bed with Brother, there IS a guestroom where BF expected your brother to be in. However, it doesn't excuse BF's behaviour when he found OP's bro with OP. He should've handled that better.
I personally cuddle with my sister but only when we HAVE to share a bed. We do have separate bedrooms. (I'm F) and when hanging out in the living room which is mostly leaning against each other, legs over the other's lap, etc.
Also, the hotel room bit. I understand if you had to share with bro to cut costs or that there is no more room available, but instead you shared a room (and by extension, bed, I guess) out of spite.
I don't think we have the full story.
Gilgamesh_is_my_King
It'd be nice if American restaurants operated like dining establishments in most other places in the world,
where the servers make enough money that they don't need to rely on tips, and they aren't expected.
But here in the U.S., if you choose to dine out,
prepare to give your hardworking servers the gratuity they're owed.
And don't fake it, either.
That happened to reddit user tamiraisredditing, who detailed the harrowing journey of being scammed out of a tip,
and getting instant revenge...
We had a guy come in last night with his date.
Throughout the evening he was the picture of courtesy and good manners.
He complimented me, thanked me every time I came to refresh waters or check on the table,
made a point to be forgiving of a kitchen mistake, super extra nice.
The dream customer, really.
I appreciated it but didn’t delude myself that I was the source and figured he was just in a good mood because the date was going well—
They were chatting, laughing, having a great time, so I assumed I was an indirect beneficiary.
He was certainly in some kind of celebratory mood because he was sparing no expense.
He asked for our highest quality wine, she got our most expensive entree, he ordered one of every appetizer for her to sample when she made a remark that she was having trouble deciding, it was a real feast.
So the evening starts wrapping up and I get their check.
I ask if they’ll be together or separate.
She starts to say “Separate,” but he makes a big deal of saying, “Oh, are you kidding? Together, definitely together.
You never have to pay when you’re with me babe,” and so on and so forth. Then slides me a credit card.
I get everything sorted and bring out the receipt. He fills it out and it came to $289.00 total.
He doesn’t even blink and makes a big show of leaving a $100 tip.
He thanks me for my service and emphasizes what a lovely night they’ve had.
Of course, a tip that size is exceptional, so I thanked him profusely.
He said there was no need to thank him and goes on a big tear about how underappreciated waitstaff are
and to just think of it as a stand-in for all the ingrates who didn’t treat me right, going,
“Don’t plan to tip, don’t plan to eat out, you know?”
Looking at the mesmerized girl the whole time and not giving me a glance.
I could care less where he was looking,
I was looking at the upcoming hundred bucks.
I thanked him again and said I hoped to see them back soon and that was that.
So he helps her into her coat and off they go. Great night, I was riding high.
About 90 seconds later he’s back in the door, without her, going “I think left my—“
then when the door shut and, looking to make sure she was out of earshot, he goes, without the slightest shade of shame or embarrassment,
“Mark the tip down to twenty bucks Hun, I was just playing it up for my date. You understand.” And turns to go.
Uh... I understood, but not how he hoped I would.
But I couldn’t make a scene in the middle of work, that’s not my place,
so I just said one more time in order to give his conscience a chance to sink in,
“Ok Sir. You’d like to amend your tip from one hundred dollars to twenty dollars, is that correct?”
And even though I didn’t show a hint of displeasure in my voice he shot back, extremely hostile,
“Yes, and if I see a cent over the twenty on there I’m going to dispute the whole meal with my credit vendor,
so, don’t try to pull anything.”
The most frustrating part of this for me was not even going from an over 30% tip to under 10%,
but rather that this poor girl was being strung along, with no idea of who the guy was behind her back.
It was extremely manipulative of him which is a major red flag.
I’ve had my fair share of toxic relationships in the past and really wish someone had pulled the blinders off my eyes,
so desperately wanted to do something to alert this girl to the trick the guy had pulled, hoping it would be a catalyst to her questioning his other actions.
But, again, I was at work and that just wasn’t my place.
So I altered the bill and that was that.
Then, just in time, something occurred to me and I darted outside hoping to catch them in the parking lot.
I got lucky.
They’d parked on the street instead and he was still dealing with the parking meter.
So, I flagged him down and rushed across the street,
nearly stumbling into traffic in my haste for a delicious moment.
His date was already in the car but rolled down her window, since no one expects the waitress to follow you out to your car waving her arms like a crazy person.
I made it across and said, more than loudly enough for her to hear,
“Sir, we amended your tip from $100 down to $20 as you requested, but you’ll actually need to fill out a different receipt reflecting your new total for our records.
Your old receipt still has your original tip of $100 written on it,
but since you just came in and asked us to charge you $20 instead, we can’t have a discrepancy in our records.
I hope you understand.
This is just a bookkeeping regulation that goes way above me. It has nothing to do with your retroactively downgrading your tip from $20 to $100, we’re just glad you enjoyed your evening.”
His jaw was on the floor.
He tried to pretend as though he didn’t know what I was talking about,
trying to give me some line about,
“I think you’re after someone else, I’d only come back cause I’d forgot my keys.”
But I would not let it rest.
The more he played dumb the more I repeated versions of
“You wanted to change your tip from $100 down to $20, you came back in,” and on and on.
So we went back and forth for a few more seconds when finally he went,
“Ok, whatever, uh, sorry for the miscommunication.
If you need me to fill out a new receipt I can.”
And I, totally even keeled was like,
“You only need to fill out a new receipt if you want to change your tip from $100 down to $20.”
And I’m guessing he didn’t have the money in his account because... he did it.
He filled out the new receipt.
His girlfriend was visibly shocked and the man was staring daggers through me,
you could feel the rage emanating off him.
It was vicariously quite satisfying in place of the other toxic men I never did get that confrontation with.
And all the bad tippers.
Ironically the exact kind he made a righteous speech decrying just a few minutes beforehand.
And then off they drove, I’m sure never to patronize our restaurant again,
but hopefully never to go out together again either, which would make it totally worth it.
So what did we learn from this story?
Well, you should tip your server if they did a great job, because they earned it.
And if you need a reason beyond that, you should do it because if you don't, karma might get you.
And as this tale showcased, sometimes karma strikes back immediately.
Marriage is supposed to be a joyous union between two people in love.
The proposal is stressful, but when they say "yes" both sides should be happy.
However, that wasn't the case in this story you're about to hear.
A redditor made a throwaway account to ask the community if he was the a**hole for how he reacted when his bride-to-be revealed she wasn't happy with her engagement ring.
And, well...
we and all of Reddit had some strong opinions on this one...
I (30m) proposed to my (then) girlfriend (27f) of 5 years last month,
it was wonderful and she said yes, and we were never happier.
Last week was when the trouble started, as she asked me how much I had spent on her ring.
I told her that I had spent about $20,000 on it that I had been squirreling away for the last 10 years.
(When I first started saving I was planning on building a kit car but when I started seriously considering proposing I decided it was worth spending the money on the ring.)
She was initially floored that I had spent so much but later became suspicious that I had managed to get such a large stone (3.6 karats.) for the price,
and asked to see the diamond certificate I got with the ring.
I, of course, showed it to her (I thought she was worried I had been duped into buying a fake.)
and when she saw it was lab grown she got upset that I hadn't bought her a "real" diamond.
This reaction stunned me for a couple of reasons.
Firstly, I had always been open in my distaste for the natural diamond industry,
and secondly because I had employed the assistance of her friends and mother and everyone agreed that she wouldn't care if the diamond was lab grown.
Over the last week I have explained to her multiple times my reasons for going lab grown,
(It is better for the environment, I know the exact origin of the stone, so I know it isn't a conflict stone, and ultimately it is better value for the money and I wanted to get her the most beautiful ring possible.)
and that lab grown diamonds are in every way real diamonds and that they are also indistinguishable from natural ones unless you look at their certificate.
I have also pointed out that she had no clue and would have never known if I hadn't told her the price of her ring.
But she insists that she can tell a difference and it is just not the same.
Yesterday she asked me if I would be willing to exchange it for a natural stone of equivalent value.
Normally I would be happy to, but I spent months searching for the perfect ring for her and also,
though value was the biggest reason for me, the idea of potentially getting a blood diamond really does sicken me.
So I said no, and said if she wanted to give the ring back and end our relationship,
that is fine, but I would not exchange it.
Since then I have received multiple texts from her friends telling me to just acquiesce and exchange the ring
(and, ultimately, I will if it means saving the relationship) but I just feel like this is something worth being firm on.
This is a pretty good sign of how the actual wedding and marriage will go imo. NTA.
You're trying to look out for the world, if a "real" stone was that important to her,
she probably would've brought up being against/wanting a lab-created diamond at some point in your relationship.
She's being picky and should've been happy about the ring, which btw, sounds gorgeous (and I commend your effort for looking into options for so long).
Keep being a dope person.
Also, I can't imagine asking my partner what they spent on a ring for me unless it was for insurance purposes or something like that. Idk.
CZT1991
NTA You spent $20,000 on a ring and she isn’t happy?
I think you have bigger fish to fry.
What’s going to be enough for her?
Beautiful_mistakes
The main takeaway from this tale and Reddit's reaction to it can be perfectly summed up with this response:
"Don’t marry this woman."
Loud_Charity